Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
