every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.