I love black thongs
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
