Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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