you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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