bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
