Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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