I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
