Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Its about making memories worth repressing
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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