It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
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No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
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And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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