win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
