Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
