just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
