I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
