this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
