Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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