But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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