im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize