question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
