Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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