dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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