I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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