The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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