We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
my sisters under your porch take her home
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
