Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
