Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize