remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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