she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
