Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
