Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize