never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
