I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Fuck appropriateness.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
