And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize