My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
