Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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