I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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