its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
