yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize