Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm passing your future prison.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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