we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
