I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize