Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
