i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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