Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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