Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
