I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
