I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
