If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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