is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
