And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
