wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize