Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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