your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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